A few years ago, when I was living in the housing co-op and looking for a quick cookie recipe, I came across a blog post for something called “Norwegian Christmas butter squares.” I’d never found anything like it before: it created rich, buttery and chewy cookies, like a vastly superior version of the holiday sugar cookies I’d eaten growing up. About a year ago I went looking for the recipe again, and failed to find it. The blog had been taken down, and it sent me into momentary panic.
Luckily, I remembered enough to find it on the Wayback Machine, and quickly copied it into a file that I’ve saved ever since. I probably make these cookies about once a month, and they last about five days around my voracious husband – they’re fantastic with a cup of bitter coffee or tea. I’m skeptical that there is something distinctively Norwegian about these cookies, but they do seem like the perfect thing to eat on a cold day.
Norwegian Christmas Butter Squares
1 cup unsalted butter, softened
1 egg 1 cup sugar 2 cups flour 1 tsp vanilla ½ tsp salt Turbinado/ Raw Sugar for dusting
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Chill a 9×13″ baking pan in the freezer. Do not grease the pan.
Using a mixer, blend the butter, egg, sugar, and salt together until it is creamy. Add the flour and vanilla and mix using your hands until the mixture holds together in large clumps. If it seems overly soft, add a little extra flour.
Using your hands, press the dough out onto the chilled and ungreased baking sheet until it is even and ¼ inch thick. Dust the top of the cookies evenly with raw sugar.
Bake at 400 degrees until the edges turn a golden brown, about 12-15 minutes. Remove from the oven. Let cool for about five minutes before cutting the cooked dough into squares. Remove the squares from the warm pan using a spatula.
all Bucky wanted to do was get some more tea and now this. Thanks a lot, Sam. You had to fuckin’ tell him, you ass.
Aggressively Progressive Steve Rogers is so what I’m here for.
STeve would unleash and be all “DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH WHOOPING COUGH SUCKS?! DO YOU?! DO YOU REALLY?! ARE YOU FUCKIN’ STUPID?! BUCKY, TELL THEM HOW I BROKE TWO RIBS! TELL THEM!”
Omg, new headcanon, Beleaguered Bucky Barnes being grabbed by the shoulders and practically lifted into camera view by Steve shouting about how Bucky needs to confirm some terrible illness because no one else is alive form that time to corroborate any of Steve’s claims. Bucky shyly telling the reporters that yes, Steve did indeed have that thing adn yeah it is dangerous and Steve jumping back into frame like “I told you! I TOLD YOU IT SUCKED SHUT UP JENNY MCCARTHY!”
“AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE?! POLIO!”
“Steve you never had fucking polio-”
“YEA BUT IT STILL SUCKED! KNOW WHAT STOPPED IT?! VACCINES!”
“Oh my God, Steve.”
“I DIDN’T EVNENKNOW WHAT THAT SHOT WOULD DO TO ME BUT I TOOK IT!”
“Steve, that’s… That’s not really a good argument.”
“I DON’T CARE FOX NEWS NEEDS TO STOP USING MY IMAGE!”
“Steve, doll, calm down.”
“I VOTED FOR OBAMA!”
I love everything about this post
And all the while Sam is just laughing his fucking ass off and Bucky is wondering if he could just go take another nap for a few years.
Okay but imagine the savvy pediatrician who shyly sends Steve a message at Avengers Tower. She loves his message. Loves it. Wants to know if she can give her vaccinated kids a sticker of the shield because she wants other parents to subtly get the message, and of course what kid doesn’t love Cap? She’s no graphic artist, but she got a picture of the shield off the Internet …
… two weeks later, a box arrives at her office. It’s an order of shield stickers, very clearly actually produced by a graphic artist. Some of them sparkle, some are metallic, and some of them say “Protecting my friends by protecting me!” for the older kids who can appreciate the idiocy of the anti-vax movement.
There’s also a hand-written note with Pepper’s personal address at Avengers Tower listed on it: Contact us when you need more. No charge. Keep fighting the good fight.
They end up going on sale after the pediatrician’s colleagues see them and want to pass them out. Steve insists that any profit they might make should go to the March of Dimes. Tony and Pepper barely talk about it before they go “do you know how little it costs to produce stickers, Steve?” and decide to donate the entire sales cost. They’re not expensive to sell, either, but it adds up.
Vaccination rate goes up. Being an anti-vaxxer stops being trendy and starts being seen as living in the dark ages.
second favorite part of 2005 pride and prejudice is when lizzy tells darcy that lydia ran off with wickham and he’s like “can i help” and she’s like “no” and he’s like “then i have to go do something unrelated immediately” and she totally falls for it
