I like to think that Jack is so 110% that he can somewhat tell how Bitty is feeling based on the way his food tastes.
-Jack eating his sandwich with Marty, Thirdy or Tater (really anyone that is aware of Jack and Bitty)
Jack takes one bite, makes a contemplative face, puts down the sandwhich, takes out his phone and steps into the hallway. He returns 15 mintues later and continues eating as if nothing of significance occured.
“What was that about?”
“ Something was bothering Bittle so I just wanted to make sure he was ok.”
They ponder a moment for it seems whatever the issue, it has been resovled and prying isn’t a good way to talk to Jack. So they drop it and continued with their lunch.
This happens every so often and they start to wonder how suddenly in the middle of the day, Jack claims that something is “bothering” Bitty? One day someone decides to finally ask.
“If somthing is bothering Bitty why do you wait til you eat half your food before you call him?”
“I’m not always completely sure if he’s upset unless i talk to him directly or at least eat his food.”
“His food? Like what, it tastes bad?”
“No its still delicious, but different somehow. So i just call to check up. Usually its stress from school, so we talk through it and discuss how its going.”
“But how can you taste something like that?”
And Jack Laurent Zimmermann, as if someone casually asked 1+1? His response accompanied with the slightest shrug:
“He’s my boyfriend.”
Like what a silly question to ask?
Multiple sighs are released and heads hang low. Food is put down as eyes stare blankly at the ceiling. Some even have to leave, overwhelmed by Jack’s insane sincerity.
After practice Jack notices quite a few guys on their phones. Not meaning to, Jack passes and overhears variations of “Wondering how your day has been” And “Just thinking about you so I wanted to call and say hi.”
He doesn’t think much of it, (since it oblviously has nothing to do with him), and heads home.
This post is such a classic and I love it, it makes me smile every time. Especially: overwhelmed by Jack’s insane sincerity.
Because that’s so…Jack. Intense, focused, insanely sincere. Not that he can’t ever lie or joke, but he’s so extremely straightforward and un-ironic in what he wants and how he thinks.
This is Jack who, when asked what he wanted to buy with his first NHL paycheck said “a truck”. Who thinks that his neon yellow running shoes are ‘neat’. Jack, who told Bitty he loved him after a crazy short amount of time. Jack who is sincerely polite to parents. Jack who says things in mid-game interviews like “well, the boys are all trying really hard out there” and genuinely means it.
Jack “110% Zimmermann.
Jack “oh boy there ya go” Zimmermann.
Tag: omgcp
ok goddammit someone help me out
i know nothing about hockey and i am not as devoutly interested in omgcp as many fans (and i 110% do not mean that as an insult) but did the falcs win the stanley cup in the most recent update???? i really thought they just made it to the finals, like the last game to decide if they get the cup or not??? help??
INCOHERENT UPDATE SCREAMING
omgcp instagrams + hanukkah
Bitty is the first openly gay NCCA captain in america and also Jack Zimmermann’s old teammate so the press want to hear what Jack’s got to say about that.
He’s prepared an in depth speech about how proud he is of Bitty and how brave Bitty is and it addresses the homophobia in hockey.
What happens instead is this:
“Mr Zimmermann, what are your opinions on your old teammate, Eric Bittle?”
“Eric Bittle is an amazing teammate, liney and friend and I would die for him.”
Additional:
When media ask Bitty if he thinks his team can cope with the pressure of a gay captian he just looks at them over his designer sunglasses and tells them to suck on his unanimous vote, bitch
You Forgot Your Change!
A Shitty/Lardo meet-cute for a prompt I saw earlier today: You look like you can barely afford to eat out, and you still gave me the
best tip I have ever received from a single person. [Also on AO3]
In theory, taking a job waiting tables at the posh
restaurant near the yacht club was genius. Where better to make big tips than a
place frequented by people who clearly had too much money?Turns out, rich people didn’t tip that well. Lardo had no
idea why, but it appeared to be the truth. She still needed the job, though, so
she stuck with it. Art supplies weren’t cheap, and she had a show coming up.Not that today is going to be much help for her art supply
fund. She maybe shouldn’t have made the mistake of inadvertently insulting
hyperrealism earlier, because now Beth Ann, who was hostess this afternoon, was
assigning all the stingiest people she could find to Lardo’s section. It wasn’t
even like Lardo had said it was bad! She just said it was technically
impressive, but often compositionally uninteresting. It wasn’t like she’d
memorized the portfolios of all her fellow servers.Looking at the guy Beth Ann had just seated, she thought
maybe she should consider it, just out of self-preservation. Because this guy
didn’t look like he fit in with this restaurant’s usual clientele at all. He
didn’t fit in with this entire side of town
at all. He was wearing an American flag denim vest over a slogan tee, for god’s
sake. He looked vaguely like a refugee from the set of Dazed and Confused; he looked like a dine-and-dash waiting to
happen.Still, she was a professional. Sort of. Whatever. She had
standards, anyway. So she stepped up to the table in complete customer service
mode and asked what she could get him.“I dunno, man, you think I could start with a little light
socialism?”She blinked at him. She was generally prepared to deal with
customers who went off script, but this was pushing it, even for her. “I’ll see
what I can do about that. How about a drink while you wait for the revolution?”
guess which BASIC BITCH teared up over the check please update because healthy coping with anxiety????? people helping each other cope with their anxiety??????? amazing?????
jack tends not to get drunk on purpose very often, so when he’s the DD/only sober guy hanging out with the crew, he’s come to notice the weird but distinct drunk personalities of all his friends and has even named them:
- bitty gets 110% more southern and 110% less filtered after a few drinks. he calls everyone out on their shit, dances super provocatively (RIP jack), and uses idioms that literally no one else in the room can understand. jack calls this persona Moomaw, because he’s met the actual Moomaw and the similarities are many and frankly disturbing. bitty hates him a little for it, and withholds kisses until jack stops calling him that. (out loud, that is)
- lardo remains very much herself – quiet, confident, mysterious – until someone falls over or says something dumb and then she literally Ron Swanson giggles for twelve minutes straight. he calls this the Gigglemonster and Lardo does NOT know about this because she would probably kick him in the shins for it if she did
- ransom’s the rare, lucky Happy Drunk. everything is great all the time and god everyone in this bar is fucking ‘swawsome!!!! what a great night!!! he’s the easiest to corral into jack’s truck after a night of partying. jack calls him Mr. Smiles and ransom is 100% ok with this
- holster’s the opposite, the fucking Mess. he gets into weird arguments with strangers, loses all concept of an inside voice, and serenades literally any girl (or hot guy) if left alone for more than a few minutes. falls down stairs a LOT. has no understanding of personal space or manners. his persona is called Chad because he’s kind of a dick and he resents jack for this more than he hates him for the Cruel Sheep Empire. chad will only listen to mr. smiles, but mr. smiles is easily distracted and not good at telling people off, so it’s usually up to moomaw and then things get dicey.
- shitty is a Drunk Crier, point blank. cries when he’s happy, cries when he’s sad, cries because jack bought him mcdonalds to shut him up, cries because lardo is the coolest person he’s ever known, cries because of social injustice in the world, cries because bitty snuck individually packaged jello shots into the club in the pockets of jack’s cargo pants – literally he’ll cry for any reason and it happens at least once an outing. Jack calls him Weepy McGee and shitty rolls with it.
one day tater will get drinks with jack and the crew and will ask, loudly, why holster is arguing with the bartender over the exact mixture of crap in his long island iced tea and jack will simply answer, “oh, that’s just Chad being Chad,” and all hell will break loose when holster overhears.
place swap au
au prompt: eric bittle, son of world famous chef suzanne bittle, attends Samwell culinary school after taking a year off due to a breakdown caused by his undiagnosed adhd and anxiety. there he meets jack zimmermann, a standoffish jock who’s clearly lightyears behind everyone else in experience despite his passion and talent and cannot bake at all without setting something on fire. reluctantly, Bittle offers late-night baking practices….
‘JACK ZIMMERMANN HOW CAN YOU BE AFRAID OF FIRE- No, don’t look at me like that, we’re doing this crèpe flambée from the top. Get the lighter.’
country singer bitty accidentally writes a hit about nhl player jack
Based on this post about the inspiration for Dolly Parton’s Jolene, which is somehow even gayer than the song itself. Bless you, Dolly.
It had started out so innocently.
Bitty had been tired after hours of this meet n’ greet, and when that tall drink of water walked up to get his autograph, Bitty couldn’t help the words that tumbled out of his mouth.
“Gosh, well aren’t you the most handsome fella I’ve ever seen,” he said, reached for the outstretched CD–CD! Who even bought CDs anymore?–and readied his Sharpie. “What’s your name, hun?”
“Uh, Jack,” the man said, pretty eyes going wide. If he’d been more awake, Bitty might’ve felt bad for making a fan uncomfortable. But if this Jack really were a fan, then he certainly wouldn’t have a problem with another man complimenting him. And besides, he was handsome, with his wide shoulders and high cheekbones and eyes as blue as the summer sky.
what i do is not up to you 