Consider: Jim, in the early days of his relationship with Spock, genuinely worried that he loves Spock more than Spock loves him, because he loves Spock so much, and Spock is still learning how to navigate his romantic impulses and Jim reads that as reluctance. And besides, why would Spock love him when he’s the exact opposite of everything Spock seems to value?
And then Spock, in the early days of their relationship, genuinely worried that he loves Jim more than Jim loves him because Spock runs on 100 percent devotion and he doesn’t do anything halfway and when he looks at Jim he sees forever and he’s so worried that, to Jim, this could be some passing fancy. Besides, why would Jim stay with him when he could have literally anyone?
But they’re also intelligent, perceptive nerds who are too in love with each other to function but know each other better than anyone in the universe, so Spock learns to make concessions and begins to call Jim Vulcan words of endearment that mean a great deal but don’t come off as outwardly emotional so they allow him to be himself; and Jim begins to prove to Spock that he’s in this for the long haul by introducing him to his parents over video, and insisting they keep clothes in each others’ closets (even though their rooms are right next door, it’s the thought that counts).
And anyway, after a while they just stop worrying so much because every moment together is a subtle confirmation that this is real and it’s theirs and it’s okay to love like this because that love is returned, in all its overwhelming intensity and in its own unique ways.
what i do is not up to you 