Barbarian – *smashes a 40 on the ground and yells* SCATTER!
Bard – the entire salt and pepper diner story.
Cleric – You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair.
Druid – Aaah! One feels like a duck splashing around in all this wet! And when one feels like a duck, one is happy!
Monk – I’ll just keep all my emotions right here and then one day, i’ll die.
Paladin – for those of you who aren’t catholic, I don’t mean to exclude you (even though we looove to exclude you)…
Ranger – everybody get out of my way. I just wanna sit here and feed my birds.
Sorcerer – this might as well happen. adult life is already so goddamn weird.
Rogue – Stop snitchin’, motherfucker.
Fighter – sometimes babies will point at me, and I don’t care for that shit at all.
Warlock – FUCK DA POLICE!
Wizard – I’m either having a drink or I have to pee. You’re living the golden years kid, not me.
Tag: im Living
headcanon that both erik and charles are absolute shite at chess but they both assume they’re fantastic because they never play anyone else
Charles probably suspected something was wrong when Erik’s rook “jumped” Charles’ Bishop, but didn’t want to admit he didn’t know that rule.
“Ah, the ‘moving three pawns at once’ opening. Audacious, Erik, audacious.”
The prison gards in x2 watching the game over the cameras like…
“W-What are they…what’s going on – Matt look at this shit.”
My favorite part of this is that on a meta level, in the X-men movies, one of the random trivia facts I’ve heard is that neither Ian McKellan nor Patrick Stewart know how to play chess, so they just randomly moved pieces around the chessboard when they said their lines. Every once in a while they would do something dramatic and symbolic like going to checkmate, when the script would call for it, but the rest of the time they have no idea what they’re doing.
So, in a way, this is canon 🙂
Guide to Troubled Shadowhunters
what i do is not up to you 