whoacanada:

@missweber requested NHL!Bitty dealing with Hockey RPF. This got a little longer than expected, with a side pairing of Jack/philly-cheesesteak 

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The most annoying thing is that for all of the ‘Jack/Parse’, ‘Jack/Tater’, ‘Jack/Sid’, ‘Jack/fucking-every-player-on-the-east-coast’ fic, there are a whopping SIX  ‘Jack/Eric’ fics on Ao3. Six.

On one hand, Eric’s proud they’ve hidden their realtionship so well, on the other, Eric is insulted. But really, with their disappointing portmanteau of ‘Jeric’ or ‘Zittle’, it’s not surprising they’re horribly under-appreciated.

“I just wish my fans were more creative.”

Over Skype, Eric watches Jack plow through a Philly cheesesteak with no small measure of jealousy. He’s lonely, and hungry, and his asshole boyfriend is doing this on purpose.

“You know,” Jack says, talking out of the side of his half-full mouth, “if you let the Schoons call you ‘Bitty’ our name could have been ‘Zimbits’. That’s kinda on you.”

“You’re going to sit there with that fucking sandwich and say my name is the reason people don’t think we’d be a good couple?”

Jack holds up a finger to the camera while taking another bite with an exaggerated moan, Eric flips him off.

“Hey, it is not my fault you’re three hours behind and our cheat days don’t line up.” 

“People ship me with Parse, of all people. Four of the fics are just three-ways with Kent.”

Jack hums in agreement and bites at a bit of steak trying to escape the bun. Eric needs to have a word with that boy about speaking with his mouth full.

“I’m telling your mother you’re gross,” Eric warns, picking up his laptop to walk to the kitchen, suddenly ravenous.

“She knows,” Jack chides, brushing off the threat. “But did you read the fic where we’re at the Olympics? At least you were included in the orgy scene, that’s something.”

“Tater is a very generous lover,” Eric snorts with laughter and scrubs a hand over his face. He had read that fic, and blushed all through the part where Tater and Jack’s passionate affair caused an international incident, Eric himself having been relegated to a background pairing halfway through. 

“Isn’t he just? It’s weird people don’t pick up on the tension when we play, because I feel like it’s really obvious how much I want to fuck you.”

“Romantic, Zimmermann.”

“I’m too tired for romance, Bits. I miss you.”

“You’re also too full of cow. You done yet?” Eric makes a circle gesture around his mouth. “I’m real tired of this meat grinder situation you’ve got going on.”

“Well normally I’d have a different kind of meat to occupy my time, but since you’re in Washington, and I’m in Philadelphia…” Jack grins sloppily and holds up what appears to be the other half of his sandwich.

“Lord in heaven, I’m not watching you eat that.” Eric laughs, despite his irritation.

“Yes, you are. Because you love me, and this is the only time we’ll get to talk until next Friday.”

Eric perches himself on the counter and watches Jack for moment, suddenly overcome by just how much he wants his gross, disgusting, cheesesteak mutilating, Canadian boyfriend right here.

“I love you, Sweetpea. So much.” Eric whispers, blinking away tears.

Jack stops pretending to fellate the sandwich, brow furrowed with immediate concern. “I love you too, Bits,” Jack says softly, setting aside his dinner. “This really bothers you, doesn’t it? That people don’t see us together.”

“I know it’s stupid, the whole point is that people don’t suspect anything, but, I just…”

“It hurts.” Jack finishes. “You know how hard it was to play along with the guys when they’d bring up ‘Pimms’? My relationship with Kenny was this huge, painful, part of my past and when I was at Samwell trying to piece together my life, the knowledge that there were people obsessed with who I used to be, what I could have been, what I could have had? It was too much. My freshman year, I remember trying to read this one story where Kenny came to Samwell to ‘win me back’ after I got out of rehab.” Jack hesitates like he’s said too much, before, whispering, “I think I threw up.”

Jack composes himself and looks at Eric through the screen. “I get it. I understand why you’d want people on your side. That’s nothing to be ashamed of. I want it, too.”

Eric scrubs at his eyes to stop the tears and gives Jack what must be a very watery smile.

“We’ll just have to turn up the tension when we play next month, eh?” Jack says playfully. “I mean, you’re pretty sexy when you lose.”

It was almost a sweet moment. Almost.

____

A week later Eric is wrapping up in the locker room when he gets a mysterious text from Jack.  Turns out it’s a URL link that takes him to a newly posted Jack/Eric fic: a 2000 word college AU written by someone with the username ‘zimbits4ever’.

At first Eric doesn’t get it, but as he reads he realizes it’s not just a story, it’s his story. One he’s heard Jack repeat a dozen times. Graduation day. Their first kiss. And the author’s note at the very end: ‘Ours is the only story that matters.’

Eric totally doesn’t cry in front of his entire team.