theotherrulerofallpotatos:

oylmpians:

oylmpians:

yeah hey @ Persephone can you pls stop messing with your boy toy and come back I need spring

i love the tags on this because there’s only two responses:

1. “leave her alone, she waited all year to get dicked down”

2. “draG HER SIS. WE NEED TO ESCAPE THIS SNOWY HELL”

Okay but it’s not Persephone doing this. Let’s all start putting the blame where it belongs. Demeter, your daughter is a grown woman. Get your shit together.

What’s your favourite Alexander the Great story?

systlin:

wilddragonflying:

systlin:

wilddragonflying:

systlin:

Probably how he tamed his horse, because that is some straight up Mary Sue level bullshit that no one would ever believe except the people who saw it wrote it down going “Yeah son of a bitch the kid did it what the hell.”

… I am intrigued. Elaboration?

When he was still a young teenager, his dad, King Philip of Macedon, went to look at a super awesome horse that a horse breeder was showing off trying to get the king to buy. Philip took his son along because horse shopping was the sort of father/son bonding ritual you did back in the day. 

Well, turns out this horse is beautiful and strong and fiery and wonderful and no one can ride it. Philip and his advisers agree that it is a gorgeous example of a horse, but regretfully they don’t want a half-wild and unmanageable stallion and they’re gonna turn the deal down.

At this point Alexander, who’s been watching very carefully, says “It would be a shame to lose such a wonderful horse” and just fuckin goes over to the half-wild stallion, catches hold of the bridle, and hops up on the 1500 pound half-wild horse. 

(This is a good way to get super dead, if anyone is wondering, but Alex never, once in his life, gave even a single fuck.)

Phillip and all his advisers are slightly freaking out now, visions of tragically dead and trampled prince and heir flashing before their eyes. And Alex, the little shit, proceeds to ride that horse around the paddock as calmly as a lamb. The horse quiets down and behaves beautifully. Everyone goes “What the actual fuck.” Philip is crying tears of manly pride, and according to legend says here “My son, you must find a kingdom big enough for you.”

(What happened, see, is that Alexander, being an observant sort, noticed that the stallion was shying from his own shadow. And so he turned the horse towards the sun, where Bucephalus did not see his shadow and therefore calmed down.)

Bucephalus would go on to carry Alexander through battle after battle, to an empire that reached from Greece to Africa to India. When the stallion died, Alexander gave him a hero’s funeral. 

Oh my god Alexander what the hell most people would just LEAD the horse away from its shadow not ride it!

But considering everything else I know about Alexander the Great… I’m not really surprised.

Alexander the Great had absolutely Zero Fucking Chill and a highly developed sense of Drama. 

prokopetz:

prokopetz:

You know, I think those articles comparing Homestuck to works of classic literature may be closer to the mark than many folks realise. I mean, let’s go down the list:

  • Takes forever to get going
  • Way too many viewpoint characters, many of whom are only introduced two-thirds of the way through the text
  • Careens wildly between narrative and epistolary formats
  • Long, stylistically affected dialogues, especially in situations where you wouldn’t think there’d be time to stop and chat
  • Repeated digressions about peripherally relevant worldbuilding details, often focusing on characters who play little or no role in the actual plot
  • Sentimental preoccupation with a very specific era of popular culture
  • Strongly opinionated narrator who appears to have some sort of romantic obsession with one of the female leads
  • Kills off half its speaking cast

  • Published piecemeal, alternating large bursts of content with lengthy hiatuses
  • The author isn’t getting paid by the word, but it feels like he should be

Victor Hugo would be proud, is what I’m saying.

(For those who are unsure whether this is a callout post of Andrew Hussie or a callout post of Victor Hugo, I encourage you to examine your assumption that it can only be one of those two things.)

ironinkpen:

forget slow burn romance, give me slow burn found family. give me enemies to friends to siblings. tired, weary old mentors learning to live again for their plucky young apprentices. heroes sharing apartments after world saving adventures because they’re so used to living with each other. dramatic “oh shit” moments where one gets kidnapped and the other realizes “god, that’s my kid.” i want to sit and watch in agony for thirty chapters while two idiots slowly adopt each other, someone get on it

Fic: More Than Skin Deep

sineala:

Tony can just about accept the fact that he and Steve were kidnapped and replaced by Skrulls for three months. But what he can’t figure out is why none of the Avengers noticed. And what he really can’t figure out is why none of their teammates will tell them what the Skrulls did while they were gone.

For Cap-IM Bingo (the square “Skrulls!”), this is a fluffy Skrull story. I honestly mean that. It’s really, really fluffy.

Read More Than Skin Deep on AO3 (3521 words).