Category: Uncategorized

clearancecreedwatersurvival:

As is tradition, here’s an unorganized list of all the Good Shit™ i loved in Wonder Woman. 

  • the line about how men are not necessary for sexual pleasure. Lesbian Island #confirmed
  • the inclusion of discussions of period racism and the Native American genocide
  • a well-depicted character with PTSD 
  • Antiope, my wife.
  • every time Diana just looked at Steve like ‘your culture is backwards and prejudiced and it sucks, Steve.’
  • THE OPENING BATTLE WITH THE AMAZONS WOWOWOWOW
  • didn’t include a male-gaze ridden sex scene, but did include a gratutious, moderately objectifying naked Chris Pine scene
  • Diana coming to terms with the fact that she needed to adjust her worldview and perspective on the nature of humanity, and deciding that humanity is worth saving anyway
  • THE FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHY HOLY SHITTING FUCK
  • all the greek gods are fucking dead get wrekt scrubs
  • Diana! Being so genuine and kind and compassionate!!!! 
  • the very strong anti-war message. like, it doesn’t get much stronger than completely annihilating the godly manifestation of war itself. 
  • The bait-and-switch bad guy reveal.
  • Diana “I am no man” Prince taking the greatest power walk of all time across the battlefield.
  • Diana just flying directly into a tower and smashing that shit to pieces.
  • Diana ends up by fighting for good without even needing a sword, just like she said she would as a little girl.
  • SHE PICKED UP A TANK AND THREW IT HOLY SHIT
  • i’m so gay for this character good god
  • take my fucking money patty jenkins just fuckin take it

i am so bad at focusing 9-5 like i am never going to be an Adult if my brain just fucks off for a break from about 3:30-6 before coming back like “now is the do things time!” and i’m like “no????? you fuck??? work when i need you???”

me, trying to write a fic: ok, so like… what’s the timeline for this movie?
wiki: well first [this] happens and then it leads into [this] event and-
me: no, no, no.. I mean days of the week. how much time passed in between [this] event and *this* event? did they sit and wait a few hours? was there an overnight stay? they’re wearing different clothes, so how much time has passed? I need accuracy, man
wiki: *sweats*

queer-salt-queen:

thefauxfox:

It’s early in the morning and nobody will probably read this but I just had the greatest ‘humans are space orcs’ idea

Imagine if humans are the only species that experiences impatience.

Think about it. Most prey animals are extremely patient. Ever meet a deer or a rabbit in the woods and hold still to try and out-wait the thing? I can guarantee your brain starts sending bored bored bored messages very quickly, and your instincts start telling you to give up and find something else to do. Humans can do the patience thing- as evidenced by our endurance hunting methods- but our instincts tell us not to. Correct me if I’m wrong, but this feels like a predator development. I have the idea that if aliens are mostly prey-based, and we’re predator-based, then the aliens will be very patient and we just aren’t.

As an evolutionary development, being impatient can be brilliant. It means that we didn’t sit around and wait for the ice caps to warm up, we knew we didn’t have the technology to survive that level of cold, but we did it anyways. We were trying to send people into the sky and then into space before we had fully figured it all out, simply because we didn’t want to wait and think it out, we wanted SPACE and we wanted it NOW. And personally, I tend to be extremely productive and inventive when I’m feeling impatient. Mechanic is booked for a few days? I’ll figure out how to change my oil and tires and tint my car’s windows myself. Strawberry season is still 4 months away? I’ll get a heat lamp setup and grow them myself. Friends can’t visit and help move furniture for a week? I’ll build a trolley out of some toy cars, tape, a chessboard, and do all the lifting myself.

This impatience is what made us design faster cars, faster computers, faster internet, faster communication, methods of growing food faster, of processing food faster, we’re always looking for the quickest and most efficient thing simply because we are not patient. 

Impatience leads to a type of creativity and persistence that patience just doesn’t have.

Imagine aliens starting to realize this.

“You got to your moon before you had developed LED screens??? You didn’t even have computers that could do basic math?!”
“Well, what else were we gonna do, sit around and wait?”

“Your planes don’t have gravitational control? Don’t you experience discomfort from the acceleration and directional changes?”
“Sure. But we needed to get on the other side of the planet in a decent amount of time.”
“So… what you’re articulating is that you’d rather have physical distress than have to have a long journey?”
“Yeah, pretty much.”

“Human____, our mechanical teams will be on site in several of your earth hours, so we won’t be going anywhere until then.”
“Screw that. Where’s the manual for this thing? I bet I can fix it.”
“But you don’t have any mechanical training.”
“I also don’t feel like sitting around on this rock for ages.”

“You’re back already? I thought your medical representative told you to not be walking on that limb for another of your weeks.”
“Ugh. I just can’t anymore. I’ve got to get up and move and do something, anything.”
“But doesn’t that hurt to walk on?”
“Absolutely.”
“…You would choose pain over waiting?”
“What can I say, I’m not a patient person.”

Like aliens just being baffled that humans would rather work hard or struggle with a problem or even experience pain and discomfort. They, as prey species, are used to just waiting it out. They don’t have the same impatience driving them to get up and go and to fight through things just because they can’t wait any longer.

Bonus: 
Human: Ain’t nobody got time for that!
Alien: Why don’t you have time? Is something scheduled soon?
Human: No, I just don’t feel like wasting time.
Alien: But… it’s not wasted. It’s time well spent. And you do technically have the time to spare for that. If there’s nothing scheduled, then you do ‘got time for that’.
Human: No. No, I don’t. It’s just… no.

“Isn’t one of your most famous phrases ‘good things come to those who wait’ why do none of you wait?”
“Because our response to that phrase is ‘fuck that’ so nobody actually says it unless they’re being a jerk who doesn’t want to help.”

princessofbadassery:

wizardshark:

randomacts13:

maxiesatanofficial:

maxiesatanofficial:

okay, so, I love all the posts that run off the assumption that humans are the most ridiculous sapient species in the galaxy

but what if it’s just the other way around

what if humans are notoriously straitlaced and obsessed with protocol. the bureaucrats of the stars.

which is obviously something we would constantly try to complain about and disprove only for some Alpha Centaurian to be like “Captain, your species formalized spirituality, repeatedly, and a recurring theme therein is that the heavens themselves are run as a bureaucracy. Even your rebellions and revolutions are meticulously planned.”

it’s not a bad thing, per se, to have a human on your team — analytical minds, good diplomats (if only because one human etiquette system can be more complex and even contradictory than the vastly varied customs of an entire species) — but be prepared for them to call attention to moral quandaries and loopholes that never would have occurred to you.

and speaking of loopholes, do be careful, because the only thing worse than a human armed with an ironclad system of rules is a human who’s found a gaping hole in them.

“You’re telling me there was a mass movement to name a boat something dumb as a joke?”

“First of all, it wasn’t a mass movement, and second of all, the boat was by no means the first time nor the last.”

“…Exactly how much of Earth comedy is based on incongruous branding?”

Hear me out here: Humans as both.

Like most sapient species assume the above; humans are straitlaced, meticulous, and methodical. They follow strict rules which dictate their social interactions and even a slight variation is considered taboo. They are the quintessential bureaucrats.

Except when they’re not.

We’ve talked about humans method of scientific exploration and advancement involving a ridiculous amount of danger for all parties involved. But, ya know, we write it all down in a very orderly manner and get published and peer reviewed. And then other humans copy the incredibly dangerous experiment to see what happens for themselves.

Humans survived the volatile early years of their species rise through community-bonding. They put the needs of a group of individuals over all else; hunting as a group, eating as a group, raising families as a group, and sometimes dying as a group. This tendency to form strong bonds means that while a human’s signed contract can always be trusted. It also means that a human cannot be trusted to not rip that contract up and say “Fuck it” if an individual with whom they have a community-bond is in danger. Other species are baffled to discover that the individual in question need not be human, or even sapient. Stories of humans who have defended what would normally be considered prey animals by other omnivorous species, of humans who have killed to defend their non-human crew mates, even one story (surely just a story, it can’t be true) of an entire crew of humans who elevated a simple non-sapient cleaning bot to officer’s rank and threatened rebellion if it was decommissioned.

So, sure, humans are logical and awfully organized for such a diverse species. They make phenomenal bureaucrats and politicians. They’re highly sought after as strategists and advisors to royalty the galaxy over.

But, they’re also appear to take great pleasure in looking the rules dead in the eyes and very deliberately thumbing their nose as those rules. Because, the rules (and logic) say you probably shouldn’t jump off a cliff into unknown waters and humans have made multiple sports based entirely off that concept.

as an individual: logical, organized

as a species: hold my beer

I love that Stabby the robot has become part of the Canon of “human interaction with aliens”.