i reread Bad Things Happen because i hate myself
Category: Uncategorized
i’m only just now watching the most recent ep of the bold type and i am a gross sobbing mess
Jacqueline Carlyle in The Bold Type, destroying the ‘horrible female boss’ stereotype.
For viewers closer in age to Hardin’s Jacqueline Carlyle, her version of a woman in charge is a refreshing subversion of this damaging archetype. The younger characters are the stars of the show, but Hardin’s Jacqueline is a nurturing force who pushes her employees to do their better as opposed to whipping them. And it’s under her leadership, and Watson’s careful shaping the story, that Scarlet thrives on support and collaboration as opposed to rivalry.
#yoga#where is this dude’s romance novel#THE SCOTTISH LORD’S SECRET#his secret is yoga#YOU MUST TRY IT MISS DUNTHORPE#he enthuses at the heroine#over kippers#YOUR HEADACHES WILL VANISH#uh huh says miss dunthorpe#who had kind of been hoping#the secret was vampirism#anyway then he demonstrates#just like this#miss dunthorpe regards his thighs#and his biceps#and reconsiders her opinion (fahye)
the boots are the best bit
(reblogging for the tags which made me hoot with laughter and startle the cat)
please note that a properly worn kilt has nothing underneath it. so. this was a little nerve-wracking
I have some (probably unexpected) opinions on the whole “wear nothing beneath the kilt” thing, but I’m gonna ignore them in favour of ogling the stretchy shirtless dude.
imagine a rosario vampire kind of setting, where a human winds up at a monster school. except the monsters all know they’re a human. maybe they’re part of a new “monster/human friendly relations” project. everyone is pretty cautious about causing an incident, so they’re treading lightly around the human. but the human doesn’t even bat an eye at the strange stuff that goes on, so the monster kids gradually become more relaxed around them.
here’s the thing. the human doesn’t actually realize they’re at a monster school. they’re basically the living embodiment of “staying in their lane”. they see strange monster things happening and they’re like “huh. well that’s none of my business” and just go about their day
so the monsters think the human knows what’s up and doesn’t care. the human thinks they’re at a weird but ultimately normal human school. then the human sees something so explicit that they can’t help but connect the dots, like a werewolf transforming right in front of them. the human screams, the werewolf yelps, everyone else starts screaming too. there’s lots of confusion all around.
eventually they all figure out what happened. then the human’s friends start quizzing them on how the hell they never noticed.
“the werewolves literally walk around with their ears and tails out.” “I thought they were just furries okay?!”
“but the vampires drink blood at lunch! only blood! they don’t eat!” “listen, even goths can be insecure about their weight. it’s not my business if they want to go on a weird tomato juice diet.” “I guess that explains why you hugged Travis and told him he was beautiful the way he is that one time.”
“there are fairies in our math class. they have wings.” “*shrug* theater kids are weird.”
“Ynolk’ku is the offspring of an eldritch abomination. the whispers of the dead follow xem wherever xe go. are you saying you never heard that?” “I figured it was just really loud creepy music playing from xer headphones.”
“centaurs. harpies. nagas.” “okay I know I already said furries, but really committed furries.”
“Cindy is a sasquatch and she’s covered in fur.” “who am I to tell a girl to shave?”
“the dryads wear clothes made out of living plants.” “aesthetic or death.”
for not watching game of thrones or knowing what the fuck is going on, i sure am invested in the gifsets i see.
I feel like this is exactly what’s happening, judging from the gifs.
i’m told she’s doing well.
Mom Friend
Ok but imagine how the aliens would react to the idea of the “mom friend”. Like the crew is losing their mind over the fact their human is reckless, doing so many dangerous things that would have killed any other race but of course it’s fine because it’s a human and those things are so hard to kill anyway.
The only planet that is a danger to a human is the one it came from.
So when the human-Kat comes into the control room with that adorable hopeful face a lot of the crew members are instantly on guard. The last time Human-Kat had that expression they almost lost Xe’rex to the waves of that one planet that Human-Kat just had to “Surf”.
“Can my friend Lola come meet us for the 34-OJ mission? She’s right in our pathway to that new planet? Please?” Huamn-Kat says and though they want nothing more then to say no, the crew of 626- Launch can’t say anything else other then yes. They know how humans react when left alone for too long. Humans claim that their greatest criminals are placed in “solitary confinement” as punishment which goes very far to show how much bonds affect their life spans.
Human-Kat needs human interaction to stay alive and sane (or as sane as humans can be)
So the crew agrees to have Friend-Lola on the voyage, slightly terrified of having two humans. But when the new human arrives it is not what they expected.
“Kat, have you finished your paperwork? Come on man, you know it’s due in like a day. Get on it.”
“Whoa dude, I love you ok. But no. You are not going to go surfing down there. It’s for your own good.”
“Girl you got the promotion?! Yes! Ok Ok! We need to celebrate with girls night in!”
“Hey I have some tissues in my bag somewhere hold on. There ya go.”
“Look at this game I picked up on RE-vr’. It’s just like Cards against Humanity but space!”
“Go. To. Sleep. Kat.”
“Remember that pact we made in high school? The one where I would stop you from doing something that will get you arrested or killed? Yeah well I’m calling it into action and saying that you do not lick anything on a unknown planet!“
This Human…holds common sense? That is possible for that race?!
After Friend-Lola leaves they ask Human-Kat about this and she merely laughs while swiping through photographs she had taken with the other human.
“Well Lola is the mom friend.”
And the crew of 626-Luanch are so confused because they have already seen photos of Human-Kat’s birth givers and they look nothing alike not to mention Human-Kat already has a Mom. Do humans have more then one “Mom”?
“Oh you know a mom friend is the one friend in a group that keeps everyone else from dying.” Human-Kat jokes.
But the crew is amazed. They have learn the reason humanity haven’t killed itself off. They send a message to every out post in the area.
If xe have a human on-board make sure that they are accompanied by a Mom Friend. These are the humans in charge of keeping other humans alive and well-behaved.
Oh my god
The human classification system is in constant evolution, but the addition of Mom Friend has helped with establishing parameters for the care and well-being of human crew members. There have been cases of incompatibility, especially with sub-class Asshole of the designation Cranky, but the provision of a designated “Ship Mom” has generally created greater stability for vessels with multiple humans on board.
An important note for Mom Friend humans is that they must be provided with designated human crew to care for. Even with said provision, some will expand their interest to monitoring and nurturing all sapients on board. Such monitoring may include anything from restructuring the mess to provide optimal nutrition with occasional “treats” to engineering a way to ease molting with the application of a warm, nubby cloth and soft cooing. Some Mom Friends can be stopped from this; there is a ritual surrounding the phrase “I was just trying to help” that is still being investigated for potential use after it is properly translated and understood.
Care should be taken to ensure that Mom Friend sub-class “Mama Bear” is kept away from weapons storage if there is any interest in survivors after a ship is boarded.
Any Mom Friend designated human using “that’s it” in a declarative manner should be treated with level III diplomatic protocols. If the phrase is accompanied by some variation of “had enough,” evacuation of the immediate area is advised.
I gotta use these pick up lines soon
» … but as has always been the case, I don’t require your help.
aesthetic asks:
• send me a fandom/character/etc. and i’ll make a picspam.
Peggy Carter for @marthajoness & @peteir.
