An even earlier version of Say No To This which includes Angelica and Eliza singing part of Helpless and Satisfied.
This is such a heartbreaking version. His “hey” really hits you in a different way, Eliza and Angelica’s appearance is perfect, his “nobody needs to know” is soo… broken.
And his “yes"s in this one… do things to me. Um. Whoa.
I never reblog illegal recordings but LORD you guys all need to hear the “yes"s in this. I’m literally dead. Holy fuck.
every single negative stereotype about women was dreamt up by men who were projecting. fight me about it.
“women can’t drive”
It is so well known that women are better and safer drivers than men that OUR CAR INSURANCE RATES ARE LOWER. Women get into fewer accidents, get fewer DUIs, and receive fewer speeding tickets than men.
“women never shut up”
Several scientific studies have shown that not only do men talk more than women, they also think that women have been talking for much longer than they actually have. Men interrupt and talk over women, dominate conversations, and still think women talk too much.
“women are shallow”
Lol next
“my wife is my ball and chain lmao”
Multiple studies have shown that marriage between men and women: Increases male lifespan, decreases female lifespan Decreases male depression rates, increases female depression rates Decreases male stress levels, increases female stress levels Increases male health and happiness, decreases female health and happiness Increases a man’s chance of getting a raise or promotion, decreases a woman’s chances of getting a raise or promotion
“women are too emotional”
Men love to say this about women after hurting them, in order to shift the blame and dismiss their feelings in one go. In reality, women are taught to hold our tongues and control ourselves quite literally from birth. We’re taught to put men’s needs and wants ahead of our own emotions regardless of the personal cost. Men are taught to do more or less whatever the fuck they want to women. Men take their emotions out on women while women are expected to shove theirs down.
I could go on and on but I don’t really think I need to.
“women are shallow” (just read the book, Dataclysm. by okcupid founder (?) that includes data about sex, gender, race, in finding online romantic partners)
jack won’t watch a british show without french subtitles because it’s too hard to understand their accents, but he also watches foreign movies with english subtitles even though the french option is right there??? jack????
unclear on how his own name is pronounced. his parents don’t seem very sure either. he is afraid to ask.
jack hates english punctuation so much. so much. why is it always cramping his style.
shitty can tell when jack’s writing a paper in English because his texts get increasingly capital-F French
shitty replies with “hello jack . when are we going to annie ‘ s . lardo says << i ‘ m hungry >> .”
The Autocorrect Struggle
autocorrect is also cramping his style
marty texts to ask about the game schedule the next day and jack, being half asleep, forgets to change his language settings and replies “Devonshire entire la a 17 heiress pour lo dinner”
marty always replies to these texts with “thanks, jacques, that was helpful”
he is a jerk.
jack’s slowly teaching his english autocorrect to speak french; shitty claims that if you yell “hey siri – FUCK NO” when it corrects to the wrong word it’ll learn faster
autocorrect knows to leave tabarnak alone, because jack is a great teacher.
speaking of siri – why does she not understand anything jack says ever, any of the time. jack and siri Are Not Friends. they are not bros and jack does not like her.
absolutely refuses to watch disney movies in english. that is not the language of disney. he’s seen a whole ten minutes of the english version of the lion king; all of the voices were Wrong
he thinks bilingual puns are so funny!!!! he only gets say them every once in a while but they’re hilarious!!!!!!!
jack once called ransom, with an actual honest to god phone call, just to tell him a great pun that bitty didn’t react to strongly enough
(a key part of rans’ impression of jack is the phrase “i just told bitty this one but he didn’t laugh”)
he takes german for his language credit freshman year (shitty: HAVE YOU NOT DONE ENOUGH) and fails a test on possessives because he never learned how to use apostrophes in english and he can’t figure out how to translate plural possessives. he may be the first person to fail a german test because his english isn’t good enough.
just?? random gaps everywhere in his english knowledge, honestly. he can write a paper but he doesn’t know what an adverb is. he missed two spelling tests in high school because of a concussion and he still just lets spellcheck tell him how to write “occurred”
jack knows history vocabulary but he learned a lot of it out of books and he doesn’t actually know how to pronounce any of it in english
he does presentations with his Absolute Most French Accent just so everyone is really clear that he doesn’t know what he’s doing
has no idea about science words and won’t discuss it with anyone in english, no thank you
someone claims that jack once implied that petroleum comes from exploding fish bones; every time they try to ask jack about it he dodges the question and then runs away.
There is no part of this list that I do not like.
casually closes 8 different tabs, each about a different noble in queen elizabeth 1′s court
